Catsup or Ketchup? That Is the Question.

I have been pondering a deep question. Ketchup or Catsup? And what's more, why on earth do we have two choices? I googled it, and while the answer is not from wikipedia, which would make it the definitive answer, I found a little info here.

My conclusion? It is clearly meant to be ketchup. Because saying "cat-sup" is akin to saying schedule all british-like, "shhhhedule." Like nails on a chalkboard. Or, since that noise does not get to me as much, like styrofoam against styrofoam. Ugh. Hate that noise.

Thank You Very Much (queue Scrooge soundtrack here)

“To speak gratitude is courteous and pleasant, to enact gratitude is generous and noble, but to live gratitude is to touch Heaven.” ~Johannes A. Gaertner


Deep thoughts.


I feel like this is a true statement. What is the difference between enacting gratitude and living gratitude? I've been thinking long and hard about this for the last five minutes, and I have concluded that the difference is that enacting gratitude could be a one-time act like sending a thank you card, which is a very nice thing, and not to be pooh-poohed (thank you thesaurus), while living gratitude is about an everyday attitude or approach to life. I have not learned how to live gratitude. Sometimes I have thoughtful moments and I enact it. Why, just the other day I made a list of people to thank. I consider this a great accomplishment.

How can we live gratitude? I have come up with the following so far:
1. Gratitude journal (thank you, Oprah)
2. Take friends out for cheesecake to thank them for bein' a friend. I'll let you go first.
3. ...

Yeah, that's all I got. Clearly I'm theees close to living gratitude. Anybody got any thoughts on things I could add to my exhaustive list above?

The Rapture and Other Things that Make us Giggle

I have been noticing a trending conversation topic on MyFace the last few days. Everywhere I look it's all about the Rapture. I noticed that it was even a topic on several major news websites. The media is enjoying poking a little fun just as much as the peeps on MyFace. And it does seem a little goofy to me that Random Dude is telling us all the appointed day that It Will All Be Over.

As much as I think that it's goofy that people believe this guy, I can't help cringe a little at all the mocking. I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. In other words, I'm a Mormon girl. :) And even my friends who love me and are respectful of my beliefs say that some of the things I believe seem a little wacky to them. I get it. It's understandable that without the element of faith, a belief in things like modern-day prophets, revelation, and *gasp* abstaining from alcohol and coffee would seem odd to say the least.

I did not believe this rapture talk, and really do find it kind of ridiculous and crazy. But my urge to point my finger and laugh is hampered a bit by a glimmer of a feeling of common ground. Their beliefs seem crazy to me, but my beliefs also seem crazy to many people. I can take some fun poked at my religion, but people can be pretty brutal sometimes. What is it that makes it so appealing to mock the beliefs of others. Why has this prediction been such a significant thing to people that they are posting and re posting on MyFace, talking about it in the grocery store, and writing news stories over and over? I'm not saying I haven't found these posts amusing, because some of them are downright hilarious. I'm just saying, if it's so ridiculous, why are we expending so much energy focusing on it?

But then, I don't get why we should care which celebrity is in rehab or whatever either. But I'm not gonna lie, I have had periods in my life where I've followed all that gossip.

Perspective

One of my friends scared the crap out of me the other day. She had a medical scare that was life-threatening. For too many terrifying hours things were uncertain. I have never felt that level of awful fear for someone close to me. I've had grandparents and aunts and uncles die, but those deaths were for the most part not startling, and it at least felt like they had lived a life. Also, generally the assurance that I will see them again and that they are with God has been a comfort to me. But this friend is my age. I have only had her for a few years in my life. That is not long enough. And really, there is no one in my life right now that I am willing to part with. I'm selfish that way. Thankfully, she is okay. Fervent prayer was uttered by many who loved her, and I believe that God blessed her.

It's been a rough couple years for me. Lots and lots of change in my life. New job, new grown-up apartment with no roommate, new friends, new ward, and severed ties with a few old beloved friends. In some ways I have rejoiced in the changes and how they have helped me to grow and expand as a person. I've learned so much and love the people and experiences that these changes have brought me. But lately I have been struggling with the challenges these changes have also brought my way. Growing is exhausting. Trying to do better and be stronger is exhausting. I feel like I'm on the right track, but, my goodness, I'm tired. And also sad, because I've lost a few friends with these changes. But this week helped me gain some perspective on things.

Those things I've been stressing about? Kind of silly. My job is hard but I'm moving in the right direction and my boss is happy with me. My friends get frustrated with me but they love me anyways even with all my crazy. If I haven't driven them away with my crazy yet that's a pretty darn good sign. And even the ones who are not speaking to me anymore are still alive. I'd rather have them somewhere out there annoyed with me than not out there.

Happy Birthday, Dr. King

A great orator and a great leader.

This was his last speech. The more I learn about Martin Luther King the more amazing he is to me . I like how he devoted his life to being the best person that he could be, and using his gifts to do the most that he could do. He said things that indicted he anticipated being assassinated. He knew the kind of position he was putting himself in as a civil rights leader. He felt that he had a calling, and he accepted that place of leadership, knowing the violence that was aimed towards those who spoke out. And he spoke so eloquently. He was a big part of the movement towards social equality. I am so glad I live in a country that no longer practices legalized segregation. People should not be treated the way they were treated then.

Watching the news report below, it makes me wonder how it would have felt to watch it then, versus now when it just feels historical. The older I get, the more real history gets to me. Having watched the reports on Columbine as a stunned college student, and listening all day to radio reports on September 11th in shock and disbelief, tragedies in history look different to me. Everything is "normal" until something happens that is so huge it literally changes society. And then normal begins to be defined slightly differently. It's horrible to think that someone could be so hateful that they would kill someone espousing messages of love, peace, and equality, because they were afraid of those ideas. There were (and I suppose, are) people who felt justified in believing that Martin Luther King, and the Civil Rights movement, was wrong and dangerous. People were so afraid of the thought of treating people equally that they resorted to murder. But, fortunately, Dr King had made his mark, and his message lived after he died. When will people learn that killing someone does not mean you silence them. I'm glad there were sane people in the country who didn't allow the movement to be stifled.

Politicalness

I don't usually talk about politics. I know I kind of dance on the line sometimes what with my little rants about social issues and whatnot. Some of those opinions probably correlate with party platforms or something. So maybe this is not a shock to you. And it probably would not be a shock to my dad. But still, don't tell him.

I think I might be a little bit liberal.

I know, right?

How do I know this? Because I have Friends on MyFace who, although they are lovely people, post somewhat moronic things, like how Obama should "give people my work ethic, not my money." Now, I'm not saying there are some lazy people out there. There are totally lazy people. But, um, there are a LOT of people out there who are unemployed. People with little ones and problems you cannot imagine. I hear about these things because of parts of my job. And these people are working their butts off to keep their kids housed and fed. Christmas was sparse for these people this year. And that might be how Christmas regularly is. And it's not because they are lazy and "milking the system." They are doing their best to survive. And, from what I have seen, this describes the majority of people receiving assistance. If you want to see steam come out of my ears, explain to me why I am wrong, given what you saw on the news that one time for a second before the story about that star who went to rehab. People who are far away from the issue can very easily pass judgement. Also, many lazy people are employed. I can attest to this. Let's start by firing them and giving their jobs to someone who does not want to make our days crappy.

Another keeper on MyFace Statuses:

This coming year, both Groundhog Day and the State of the Union address occur on the same day. It’s an ironic juxtaposition of events; one event involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a creature of limited intelligence for prognostication...while the other involves a groundhog.

You know what I think is dumb and reflects poorly on oneself? Truly disrespectful putdowns that mock a public figure in a way that makes it clear that you are willing to distort reality in order to justify your beliefs. Because, um, really? REALLY??? You, Mr/Ms. Republican, would like to mock our current president on his oratory skills? Reeeeally? Hmm. Interesting choice.

Let me just say that it annoyed me just a little bit when people ridiculed Bush's clear and true lack of oratory skills. Really, there was no arguing that public speaking was not his strong point. But at least it was a true fault. But i don't think that the corner on mocking is held by either of the two major parties. Can't we just all get along kids? I like the idea of thoughtful and insightful debate about actual issues, and not just statements about character (creature of limited intelligence...). What I'm saying here is, read the freaking paper, or watch some news, or SOMETHING before spouting off on MyFace about that issue someone at work told you about. ACTUAL FACTS, people. Base your opinions on those. I beg you.

And, seriously. Don't tell my dad.

Saving the World One Viral Video at a Time

Maybe one of your Friends posted the video that's gone viral of the homeless man with the golden radio voice on MyFace.

I just have to ask this, after seeing the buzz. Since when should second chances in life be predicated on whether you are nice, or good? We have to deserve the chance to find a better way to live our life? Really?? Well, shoot, I’m doomed. I don’t like being nice.

I understand the appeal of this video. It's nice to see someone in a tough spot with a good attitude and the chance and determination to rise above the low point they have reached. It’s a feel-good extravaganza. But here's the thing. The fact that he has a good attitude does not mean that he deserves a life that is kinder to him more than the sad looking bum ranting and raving in what you can only assume is an alcohol and/or drug induced stupor on the sidewalk downtown. You have no idea what either of them has been through. No idea what brought them to this low point. There is no way for you to see what is in their hearts. Especially not in a brief encounter on the side of the road, let alone a YouTube video. And don’t think that just because you have judged a man “good” who has been brought so low that it’s okay that you judged. Because in order to be so impressed with a homeless man that seems to have heart, you most likely expect that most homeless wouldn’t show that same amazing spirit. Apparently he’s special.

What could look like the effects of drug use could be the effects of a mental illness that causes severe, frightening, never-ending hallucinations of people you and I can't see hurting them and abusing them over and over, day in and day out. Or you could be right. It could be drug use. They could be self-medicating to escape those hallucinations. Or self-medicating to escape the awful memories of traumatic experiences and horrible present circumstances. Or they could just be an addict. One stupid, adolescent moment where they tried to fit in or escape might have lead them down the path to an addiction that grips them so hard it has enveloped their life and caused them to lose people they love and live in a way no one would intentionally choose.

I was once in an eating establishment near my office downtown having a sandwich for lunch with a friend, where some weary hellfire and damnation missionaries were breaking from handing out their leaflets of bad news, and having a little chat about the homeless people they had observed on the streets that day. The woman loudly voiced the opinion that these durn homeless people simply needed to get a job, and support themselves, instead of living off the charity of others. Because, in her mind, what was keeping these people homeless was laziness. Imagine, if you will, Holliberry watching in horror intermingled with pride as said friend confronted this hypocritical woman and told her she had no right to judge, and that she exhibited a stupendous amount of ignorance in her loudly shared opinions. Also there were other things said. I was quite proud as I edged my way out the door because confrontation is scary.

I'm not saying this isn't a compelling video. For people who may not have contact with homeless people in any real or meaningful way, it could help open their mind at least a little to the idea that homeless people are human beings with talents and personalities and opinions and childhood memories and aspirations just like we all are. Where the “viral” status gets silly is where people think that they "advocate" for homeless people by sharing this video, or commenting on it. At least, it's silly if that's the one and only effort they make for the year before turning their thoughts to whether to play with their new phone app or watch Survivor Season 50 on demand. (And yes, I’m bitter I have neither option.) Try acknowledging someone who is clearly homeless, instead of whispering behind their back, ignoring them when they try to talk to you, insulting them, or staring at them like they're the latest exhibit at your local zoo, or the most repulsive sight you’ve ever seen. Give them that piece of dignity. They’ll appreciate that even more than the bars of soap you donated to the shelter that one time.

Amazing.

Sitting in my office today I could hear some of our clients in a room far off singing along with a song someone was playing.

When I see your face,
There's not a thing that I would change.
Cause you're amazing,
Just the way you are.

Ah, Bruno. You know how to sweet talk a girl.

Seriously, though. The voices I was hearing so clearly were singing full-out, with feeling. Because those words are powerful. And what those women long to hear. Many of these women have been manipulated and abused by people they identified as loved ones. So many people tell them, in word as well as the way they treat them, that they are broken, or not good enough. How many people tell them they are amazing just the way they are? And how many people tell them they are amazing without an agenda.

It just reminded me. We need to spend less time trying to change each other, because that's not our job, and more time reaching out with love, recognizing the beautiful spirits, and encouraging each other to nurture that beauty and let it grow. Think of someone in your life who makes you feel amazing, flaws and all. They see your inner light. And start being that person that sees the inner light more.

Thought for the Day

"There is no limit to the good you can do, if you don't care who gets the credit." Harold B. Lee

For Crying Out Loud, It's Just Hair

I don't know about you, but people in my church seem to like to tell the Gift of the Magi story at least once a year. You know, the poor couple who sacrifice to get Christmas gifts for each other, so she cuts her prized hair to get him a chain for his grandfather's watch, and he sells the watch to buy her fancy combs... blah, blah, blah. It's all very touching or something. The first time I heard it, I think I found it touching, and also quite exasperating, because I hate when people have horrible miscommunication like that in stories and we are supposed to Learn Something. What I have learned is that this couple was stupid. Because,for #1: It's just freaking hair. It will grow back. I don't get people who act that way over hair.

And for #2, you sold a family keepsake??? For her hair? Blech.

And for #3,how is this some big lesson on giving? I mean, they are making enough money to have housing, food, heat, and clothes. They're getting by. Wouldn't a larger sacrifice be to give a gift to Tiny Tim or something instead of each other? Call me a cynic, but if you give a gift to your spouse, you totally get something out of it. Like, you know, a pleasant living environment and the lack of fear that said spouse will kill you in your sleep.

You Know Who Looks Goofiest?

I've been ruminating lately on your typical American adult's reaction to mental illness. There is a lady who is often seen standing outside of my office. She's generally fairly clean, although her hair sometimes looks a little wild and her clothes are often mismatched. As she stands at the curb, she has loud arguments. With thin air. To your average passer-by (or bus patron, because there's a bus stop), she's a little intimidating. She's very accusatory in her arguments, and if you are in her eye line you question at first if she is angry at you for some fictional act that she is convinced you carried out. This can be a little scary, because she can sometimes be verbally aggressive and gesture wildly. But I've never seen her invade anyone's personal space, and her intent is not to harm anyone. I'm not sure who she is arguing with, or if they are really an actual person somewhere in the world. But having gotten to "know" her by seeing her every day, I see that she has some mental issues, possibly triggered by some horrible damage done to her earlier in her life, or possibly just brought on by lack of medical treatment and support.

Today as I was going about my work, I passed by her several times as she ranted on the sidewalk. She usually will spend a little time doing this, and then move on. There was a group of three women who appeared to be tourists, or at least women who had broken their normal routine and come into a part of the city they did not often traverse. The first time I passed by, two were doing their best to ignore her, but the third looked rather alarmed, as though she thought the woman was angry at her. The second time I passed by, she seemed to have figured out that the woman was in fact angry at an invisible adversary. The third time I passed by, she had the giggles. Look at that funny crazy lady. She has obviously lost her mind.

I know that mentally ill people can be scary, especially since their illness doesn't manifest itself like many physical illnesses and disabilities manifest themselves, and you're generally not able to ascertain what ails them or how it will impact their behavior. You've seen on TV and in movies how the moods of crazy people can turn on a dime, and suddenly they are having a psychotic break and trying to kill you, and it can be easy to imagine the worst will happen.

In reality, the majority of mentally ill people are not violent. I think that it is our responsibility as adults living in a complex society to try to understand mental illness. Chances are, you know at least one person with a mental illness, whether you think you do or not. Some have been diagnosed, some have not. Chances are that if six people are reading this blog (which would be terribly exciting), at least one has been diagnosed with a mental illness at one point or another in their life, whether it is an issue today or has been treated. To stay in the dark about what it means to be mentally ill is a risky thing to do. At some point in your life, someone you love and care about, to some degree or another, will need your understanding. I recommend the website found at the above link for online information. I'm sure there's probably some other ones out there, but this is the most extensive and informative site I have found.

What makes me just a little sick inside is seeing people who have not just discomfort written all over their face when they are near mentally ill people, but disgust. The look seems to communicate that they think the person should have kept a better grip on their sanity. Or it could also be interpreted to mean that they think they are going to catch the person's crazy. Generally this is not case, unless you count things like untreated Syphilis, which leads to insanity if untreated. To me, that look of disdain and distaste is not only disappointing, but offensive. Also prideful. Who are you to think you are so whole and perfect that you can't empathise with the outward manifestations of the confusion and pain? I'm not saying the empathy and understanding come naturally, because I don't think they do; not with most people, myself included. But those traits are something we should develop as we grow into responsible adults and contributing members of society. So go ahead, giggle if you feel uncomfortable. It's a natural result for some people, myself included. But then maybe go home and read a book about mental illness, or take a class, or subscribe to a reliable blog.

I Am Beseeching You...

Stop making fun of the innocents!

I've been contemplating a trend I'm seeing in the media lately. It's come on kind of gradually since I was a little kid. I think the thing that to me has been the signal that it's become the way a large amount of society thinks is this. Oh, and this.

Yes I have a sense of humor. I put it down... somewhere... and I really wish I could find it. Oh, there it... no, that's my employment. I should really pick that up some time soon.

I do understand the humor of the geeky guy who doesn't know how to talk to women. I find it painful to watch, but I get it, and I don't begrudge people their laughs. What's troubling me is this: where are the cool virgins? You don't see them in the TV shows. They are all awkward and lacking life experience. If Hollywood manages to create a cool one, at some point they succumb to the temptation and compromise their beliefs. Apparently being stalwart is not sexy. I'm here to tell you, there are lots of 40 year old virgins out there. People who, because of religious beliefs, and/or personal standards they hold to, choose not to have sex. I don't like that men who grow to be a certain age are invited on talk shows to be gawked at like an elephant with two trunks. You can have a whole life without sex. A successful, satisfying life. That doesn't mean that sex is bad, or that those people aren't interested in it, or don't wish they could have it. But there are things in life that are more important than sex, and their choice to not dive right into it does not make them freakish.

What I am witnessing in the mentalities of our youth is worrisome to me. Teenagers should not base their self esteem on how much sexual experience they have had. Neither should adults. And to see a 16 or 17 year old talk about the lack of inexperience of a peer or themselves as though it is crippling is maddening. Smart, strong, beautiful, successful teenagers with bright futures ahead of them are defining themselves by their experience in one area. They are allowing their partners to convince them that their love is defined by those experiences. And the kids who think like this grow into 20-somethings who seek after experiences in such a rash way they become scarred and sometimes truly emotionally crippled. Why do we perpetuate this belief? And why do we laugh at virgins? I say "we" because I'm sure I've shared a chuckle, so I'm totally not casting the first stone, so to speak. It's just, if you really step back from our culture and look at the beliefs around sex objectively, aren't they a little goofy?

Thought for the Day

Don’t worry about searching for who you are; focus your energies on creating the kind of person you want to be! You will discover that as you pursue that journey you will not only find yourself, but chances are you will be pleasantly surprised and proud of the person you find along the way.

Joseph B. Wirthlin, 1999.

Just Say No To Celibacy

Do I have your attention? I've been following a bit of a debate that's been going on regarding celibacy for priesthood holders in the Catholic Church (see cnn.com). A certain prominant member of clergy in the church, with a cute last name, has been caught having an affair. He has confessed that he has been involved with this woman for several years, and that they are in love. I believe I read he had been considering if he should leave the priesthood for her. So now the question being posed (not for the first, or last time) is whether celibacy is really required to hold that holy position.

I have every respect for these men who have devoted their life to God. The majority of them are doing their best to keep themselves pure and focused on a life of serving God. They teach, they serve, and they advocate for the souls of men and women. I understand the principle behind their dedication to celibacy. That being said, I personally believe that a man can be holy, serve God with all his heart, AND be married. I actually believe that marriage can enhance his life and further his efforts. Marriage is a partnership, and hopefully the ultimate friendship. To have a partner, who believes what you believe, and works towards what you work toward with you, can only help you succeed all the more. In my church, we have a lay priesthood, meaning that they are not paid, and for the most part have other jobs outside of their church duties. For married couples, each person might have their own duties, or calling, but they support each other in those endeavors. I don't believe that God intended for us to be alone, in this life or the life that follows. The craving to be loved and love others is a good one, and God provided us with ways to address that yearning. Marriage is consecrated by God, and I believe he provided it to us for our ultimate happiness. Those who hold the priesthood are entitled to the blessings that marriage can bring along with every other faithful person. Those are my thoughts on the subject. What are your thoughts?

Laugh a Little

So today, W's oldest, Cookie (hereby so named because she wants to be a chef, and also is a cute little cookie), did the cutest thing. She was playing with bright orange "space goo" (remember gak?) from the space needle gift shop. She had it spread out into a very thin sheet, about as thin as bubble gum when you blow a bubble. She was holding it up and Baby Girl swung out her hand and "popped" it right onto the top of Cookie's head. It was spread out in a thin coat all over her hair, and she had to work at it to get it out. I haven't seen W laugh so hard in a long time. Cookie was not amused. She does not like to be laughed at. She would not have liked being in my family. She wouldn't even let me take a picture!

What ensued was a discussion about being able to laugh at yourself. W and I discussed the merits of being able to laugh at yourself when you are in what might seem at the time to be an embarrassing situation. Cookie was not convinced, but it got me thinking.

I have laughed at myself in the following situations:
1. When I fell down the steps in the business building in college in front dozens of people.
2. When I gave myself a black eye.
3. When I slipped on the rain-soaked steps at the football stadium in high school in my drill skirt and most likely gave everyone a really good view of what we wore under our drill skirts.

I'm seeing a theme developing here....

Is the ability to laugh at yourself a very important skill? If you laugh too often and too quickly, does that indicate that you don't take yourself seriously enough, or does it indicate that you know enough not to be so serious all the time? I personally think laughing at yourself is good. People should do it more often. Try it right now. I want to hear your best belly laugh. It could make you feel better. It could also make the other people in the room think you're crazy. So it's a two for one.

Reflections on the Olden Days

So the other day I saw a little girl with one of these:



Why didn't they have these when I was 5? Hmm??

On the other hand, I had the original muppet show, new episodes of Mr. Rogers, the original Scooby Doo, and many other treats. Now the poor kids have dolls with abnormally large feet dressed inappropriately, cartoons where everyone has freakishly large eyes, and the pressure from their peers to get a cell phone when they are 7. They're totally missing out.

I know, I'm showing my age.

But seriously. When I was a little kid, I remember things being carefree. I remember the city I grew up in having lots of trees, and the main road that is now 6 lanes wide being 2, or maybe it was 4, lanes wide, and the traffic not being completely aggravating. I remember playing with the neighbor kids every day. I don't remember my friends being booked up every night of the week with soccer and dance and Camp Fire and karate and art classes. Not that I object to any of those things. But when I have parents tell me they are out every night of the week taxi-ing their kids around, I think, "are you serious?" I'm unsure when these kids are finding the time to learn how to participate in unstructured play. In the little free time they do have, they are hooked up to something electronic. Kids shouldn't be bored if they don't have an electronic device to entertain them. If they are, that's a red flag. Take the thing away from them. Send them outside.

Kids with the best imaginations are the ones that don't have ten million toys and gadgets to entertain them. They are the ones that make the stick into the sword, or the shoeboxes into the barbie mansion,, or the dirt into little rivers (with the aid of a shovel and the hose) or the sheet into the fort. Those are the things I look back on and treasure from my childhood, not the fancy cabbage patch kid that I probably begged and begged and begged for. Yes, she was special, because I only got one "real" one. But the dolls my mom made for me are the ones that I want to keep forever. The homemade blocks I had to play with are more memorable than many of the storebought toys I played with.

Certain family members might mock. Yes, I have always been a tv-aholic, and I spent alot of time in front of the tv as I grew. BUT, I also was an avid reader and spent hours in my room reading books. I also loved my bike, and rode it for hours and hours. I wrote stories that my sister mocked (not that I'm bitter), and I earned awards in church and Camp Fire as I grew older. I had plenty of down time, and I have fond memories of the calm and happiness my simple schedule allowed me. People seem to be under the delusion that giving your child everything you can think of is giving them the best childhood. But really, they're just going to end up with a feeling of entitlement and no imagination. And also no memories of just being a kid.

(As a side note I think adults are overbooking themselves too. Hi, kettle, I'm the pot.)

Put down the calendar and walk away slowly.

Super Sappy Thought for the Day. Plus, Ow.

I thought I would share this super sappy forward I got today. Do you think it's true?
Occasional commentary in blue from me.

1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you. (Totally true, I get that all the time)
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you. (It's like they know me!)
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep. (And they think: "Heavenly Father, please give me patience...")
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. You are special and unique. (My mommy says I'm special)
8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. (That's a little creepy... )
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
10. When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.
11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

See, doesn't that make you feel all warm and fuzzy? I know I do. I also feel like I want to rip all sinuses, glands, ear canals, etc, out of my head. I feel that I would be a better person without those things. Also I feel that the right side of my head is going to explode. Make it stop.

What I Learned from Playing Pacman

When I play Pacman I never do well. Sometimes I get to the third screen. Sometimes. But I had an epiphany tonight. I always lose early and fast because I'm too busy looking at me and trying to get stuff, and I never see the ghosts coming until it's too late. Perhaps, I thought to myself, this is symbolic of life. We've got to focus on what's going on around us more and less on what we can get.

Or it could just be a sign that I don't pay attention. In junior high school there was this guy, Dave, who would "sneak" up on me at the same place in the hallways between the same two classes, and grab me around the waste from behind and tickle me and make me scream. This was a daily ritual. I never saw it coming. I never saw him until then.

Then in college, apparently it was common for me to be walking across campus, and I would pass right by roommates or friends, and they were yelling my name and waving as they passed right by me, and I didn't hear them. Because I was in the zone. I was very focused on getting to class.

Or it could just mean that I'm craving more fruit in my diet. You know, cherries and oranges and strawberries. There may be another fruit involved in the game somewhere but I never get past the third screen so I don't know what it is.

Or it could just be a sign I suck at computer games, or video games of any sort, really.

What I DO know for sure about Pacman, is that you gotta make sure to turn the volume down before you start the game. Especially when you're hanging out with your roommate, making some intelligent-sounding statement about the political climate. Because if you're interupted by the blast of the Pacman theme song, you may never live it down.