Two Words Not to Call Me.

I have discovered that there a few words that I really don't enjoy having label me.

1. Emotional. I AM NOT EMOTIONAL. HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT. I THOUGHT YOU KNEW ME, BUT CLEARLY YOU DON'T. STOP LOOKING AT ME. I'M NOT CRYING.

2. Different. Read: Mormon. As in, I didn't invite you to my birthday party because you are different than all my other friends. Okay, I don't completely hate that word, because I suppose it is true. But I hate it when people use it as an excuse for leaving me out.

Stinking Filarious.

I can talk good. I would like to introduce you to some new lingo you should integrate into your vocabulary.

1. Filarious. When funny doesn't cut it and hilarious seems too... easy.
2. Therapicky. Or Therapeuticky. For those feel-good moments after those feel-bad moments.

Top that, Webster.

For the Love.

My new phrase. For crying out loud has served me well, and is certainly a part of my collection of phrases to exclaim in exasperation. But For the Love is also fabulous, and I shall use it. Like today, when the fax machine kept trying to feed all three pages at the same time. For. The. Love.

Obviously this phrase is reserved for only the truly frustrating situations one encounters in life. Like the fax machine. Or the fact that I could not for the life of me get my white out container open. Or the fact that all my shows are on hiatus because of the blasted olympics. Or the fact that I have to do laundry again, even though I JUST DID LAUNDRY. OR my apparent inability to think of anything to post about.

You Know What's a Cool Word?

Progeny.

Also flabbergasted.

And hullabaloo.

You Say Potato, I Say Chipotle

I was thinking the other day about chipotle chilies, wondering what exactly a chipotle was, other than the name of a restaurant that makes fabulous chips and guacamole. In wikiworld, they tell me it's a dried jalapeno which has turned red, which apparently they do if you let them ripen long enough. Question answered. Then I realized that there is something about the word Chipotle that has always bothered me: the fact that my parents pronounce it Chip-OAT-lee. Emphasis on the oat, of course. But I always thought it was Chip-OAT-lay. Wikipedia says my parents' pronunciation is right. I thought that could not possibly be, so I looked here because I knew that they have the handy dandy little speaker you can click on to hear a human being pronounce your word of choice. There are two different speakers, a man and and a woman, and they both agree with me on pronunciation, however one of the definitions says that a chipotle is a pungent red pepper and the other says it is a jalapeno. Get it together, dictionary dot com. Wiki, did you fail me? I had to find a tie breaker.

This website I feel fairly confident is posting correct information, being that they're one of the best known dictionaries. They say that I am more right, although they also give a variation on the pronunciation, cheep-OAT-lay. That's at least fun to say.

So we've established that my parents and all you out there who are pronunciation challenged need to take elocution lessons from me, given my expertise. I would also like to establish that jalapenos are gross. Even given the passion with which I love me some Chipotle steak burrito with their yummy, yummy chips and guacamole, my spice tolerance does not expand much further. And I think that really, jalapeno eaters are showing a part of their true character that is best left hidden. You should not flaunt that kind of sickness.

Dizzle, it's not a very strong rant, but that one was for you.

P.S. Blogger does not believe that chipotle is a word. It suggest instead that I substitute the word chortle. Which is a fun word. Chortle chortle chortle.

K's Very Special Vocab Help List

Living with someone, you get to find out what words what years they use over and over and over. For me, it's words like ghetto, and seriously, and for crying out loud. For K, it is other words. I urge you to add these words to your own vocabulary, as they will make your life richer.

1. Dirty bird. Referring to people with naughty thoughts, or sometimes skeezy men.
2. Coo. As in "that's coo." She texts it that way too. I'm proud to report that she does NOT text "kewl." Dorkiest text slang ever. It doesn't even shorten the amount of buttons to be pressed. And 31 year-old men should not be using it. It's a clear indication that they still think they are 19, even though they are clearly not (I can say this because said man is one of the "I don't read blogs" people, and will therefore occassionally be the subject of my ridicule on my blog, since he won't read it. Not that I'm bitter.").
3. NASTY. Can be referring to food, inappropriately dressed people (read: people with things hanging out that shouldn't be), undesirable smells, and things dirty birds do and say.

Those are the three that come readily to mind. Mind you, I've only talked to her once in the last week, seeing as how I've been on my Magical Trip to Orlando.

Indubitably. Indubitably. Indubitably.

I have discovered that I really, really enjoy saying indubitably. Try it out. Now say it really fast. Say it again. See how fun this is? LOVE it. According to dictionary.com, it means to "too apparent to be counted. " As in "indubitably is indubitably fun to say."

What are some other fun words?

That's Just Crazy Talk!

I seem to have a new catch phrase. I knew my use of it had gone beyond what was healthy and sane when I said "That's just crazy talk!" 10 times in about 10 minutes. I was surprised my friend I was with did not stand up and yell "enough!" This phrase has joined my list of overused phrases:

1. For crying out loud! (handy in any circumstance. I blame this on my ballerina kimmy).
2. Good times. (I blame this on an old friend, Adam. I'm just thankful I never picked up on his "cool beans" saying)
3. Bless her heart (uttered when you are trying to think good thoughts about someone who is driving you crazy, possibly despite their efforts to be helpful)
4. Oopsies! (finally am succeeding in purging this from my vocabulary, but I'm moving back in with K, who got me started down that road.)

I think those are my four. Did I miss one?

*note: if whoever is letting their kid play in their car and honk every two seconds doesn't make them stop soon I'm going to go rip their steering wheel out of their car.

Who invented the word "gal?"

Because the word "gal" is ugly. Do not call me a gal. It's especially odd to me to hear a young adult use the word. Because really, who uses the word "gal" besides old people?

Oopsies!

My dear roommate K has shared a lovely habit. The other day at work I said "oopsies" approximately 5 times in a half hour period. I thought to myself, where did I pick up that perky little exclamation? That is so unlike me. Today it came to me. It's K's fault. She actually says "oopsy." Apparently I added the "s" all on my own. To punish her I shall have to come up with an equally torturesome exclamation to say all the time to get stuck in her head.

Perhaps I should try "oh, my heck!" Because according to the writers on Law and Order: SVU, this is what little Mormon girls say. ** Or maybe it's only Mormon nannies who grew up in Utah (In reality this may not be far from the truth based on my Provo experiences-- there, that should draw out some comments from old roomies if they ever actually come look at this blog ;) Or cement their eternal hatred towards me and my Seattle snobbery).

Or I could just try singing "The Love Boat" around her. Because once you've heard that song, it's stuck in your head for days. There was an entire semester in Junior High where we lived in a Soundtrack of The Love Boat.

What's the last thing you got stuck in your head?

**note: the best part about the way they wrote that scene was the fact that "oh, my heck!" was the reaction of the little Mormon girl upon hearing that her friend had been MURDERED. Totally would have been my first reaction too.**