Elementary, My Dear Reader.

I ran a week of day camp again this summer. This year, we did a mystery theme.

I thought about dressing up and then decided to just go as me. With my regular pipe and hat and all.
And then I found Waldo. He was lurking in the woods waiting to hand out lollipops to the lucky children who find him. Fun... or creepy? You decide.
Again, on secret identity day, I thought about wearing a disguise but decided to just do me. I think it was a wise decision. PS, no, I do not know what those marks are on my chin and cheek. Possibly lunch. It was probably very good.

I'm a Good Person and I Will Tell You All About It.

Reasons people are charitable:

1. Because they are nice.
2. Because they care about people.

3. So that they can tell people about how nice they are and how they care about people. They can also tell themselves this.
4. So they can be published on lists.
5. So they don't have to pay for a ticket/go to jail.
6. So they can achieve notable positions in their community.

7. To impress someone.

I'm all for charity, and for people volunteering and giving service and all that junk. But there are people in the world who are quite proud of themselves and the little ways they give. Or, in the absence of actual giving, they are quite proud of the way they talk about how they intend to give. Because all starts with talking, right? Lots and lots of talking. And if said intended future service involves The Children then that makes the speaker practically an angel. Because only the innocent truly deserve our help.

You know what makes me cranky? Besides the absence of chocolate in my house right now, that is. You'll never guess this. What makes me cranky is when people discuss potential subjects of service and essentially categorize groups of people as deserving or undeserving of help and love, based on no actual facts, but rather on personal biases and assumptions. Because heaven help us if we take the time to try to understand an issue adversely affecting people and have a little compassion for them.

I was recently delighted (and by delighted I mean severely aggravated) to hear a woman espouse her opinion that families who were homeless due to disaster, and therefore through no fault of their own, really need our help. It was her new mission to help support them in whatever way she could. She was quite proud of herself for this statement. She was feeling quite angelic. I was feeling like squishing her. On the surface, her comment was great. These people she was discussing ARE probably really deserving of a little love and support. Yeah for charity! But let's examine the qualifier in her statement. Through no fault of their own. Um, what exactly are you saying, there, Angel dear? Are you saying that Other Homeless People are NOT deserving of your charity, because they all CHOSE to be homeless? I'm sure, Angel, that you were not consciously trying to relay that message. However, it's clear from your statement (and a few other lovely follow-up statements about dirty scary people and addicts) what you think about homeless people.

Everyone is at a different place in life on their path to learning and understanding about the world around them. I totally get that. I get that while some people would be uncomfortable working with homeless people, other people would rather do that than work with a group of children. Everyone' s service of choice is different. There are lots of different ways we can make an impact in this world, and we all have different talents and preferences that lead us to give service in different ways. That's fabulous. Yeah for diversity! What I take issue with is people who insist on staying in their little bubbles and not educating themselves and broadening their minds when opportunity arise. I take issue with people passing judgement on other groups of people without taking the time to actually consider the cards life has dealt said group. Serving people does not make you better than them. If you're doing it right, you will most likely learn something in the act. If you're doing it wrong, you most likely brag about it later. I'm just saying.

Goals: A Reason to Make a List

I don't seem to have posted my New Year's Resolutions last year. I decided to make them all private and meaningful or something. I know I posted them in 2008. I feel the urge to post something this year, although you may not get the whole list. I do like a good list, and I will most likely have more resolutions than all of you combined (yes, all three of you) by the time I'm through. Here's just a smattering of my Resolutions:

1. Exercise, therefore not incurring my sister's mockery and potential wrath for requesting a heart rate monitor for Christmas and not using it. I totally have done this for three days in a row now. As I mentioned once way back when, I'm a firm believer in having unambiguous goals that you can actually reach. So instead of "exercise more" (which I suppose I've already achieved for the year), I shall say, run a ten minute mile. Shut up, stupid in shape people. Also there's more to the goal, but I'm not going to tell you now because you just got lippy. See how you vex me?

2. Spend more time with my teenagery niece and nephew. This will not be very hard, because "more" can be accomplished by one stint of quality time with either one outside of family events. Bad auntie. Also spend some more time with my little squirts. Little Brother is almost convinced it's safe to let me hold him now. I'm making some serious progress here.

3. Quit smoking. Oh... wait... hmm. Well. Check.

4. Find a new way to volunteer. Simmer down, there, Dizzle. I mean in ADDITION to Camp Fire, not instead of. Because my Camp Fire kids love me, as they should. And volunteering broadens your horizons and gives you new skills, as well as sharpening old ones. Also you can put them on your resume. I realized that last year.

5. Read the whole Book of Mormon from front to back at least once during the year. You know, instead of losing my place and starting over all the time. So I can be all religious-like and spiritual. I'm also thinking I shall read the whole Old Testament, since that's what we're studying in Sunday School. And um, just to clarify to my not Mormons, this is in addition to studying the scriptures by topic at church and stuff. I read 'em, I swear.

6. Learn more about the people I work with. Read books about mental illnesses. Learn more about addiction. Read some books on alcoholism. Read some books to understand other cultures. Phew, I need to be reading me some books. Let me know if you have recommendations.

What are your resolutions? Or are you resolution haters?

Tips for Being an Effective Community Helper

I never used to understand WHY it takes a training to learn what it means to volunteer, or how to best do it. People will literally spend hours talking about this in my line of work. In some ways that makes me want to take my head and bang it soundly against a blunt object until blessed unconsciousness overcomes me. But here's the thing: a lot of people suck at planning service projects.

If there is one thing that you remember about planning a group service project/donation drive/we're going to fix the world fest, remember to ask this one question: Is this actually needed?

Silly, right? That's just common sense, right? Turns out not so much. I cannot tell you how many different groups I have worked with who have not asked this basic question. I've sat in both on the planning, and been the one they contacted. And often the planning goes like this:

You know what would be fun? We should knit a bunch of hats! That would be so fun! Okay, so, um, who wants to figure out where to donate them and call them to find out where to drop them off?

People. People. People. No one wants your hats. Or at least you don't know if that's what they want. They might want your hats a little bit. They might possibly just take them in hopes that you will go away, because, yes, eventually they will use them, along with all the other hats. But they might more desperately want spoons. And wouldn't a spoon drive be fun? But you wouldn't think of that right off the bat. Because who collects spoons? That's what makes it so brilliant, though!

Here's how you might want to think about starting the discussion:

What are some needs we see in our community? What organization that
addresses the problem can we contact to see how we can best contribute
resources? Let's call them and then reconvene to plan our project based on
what we learn.

It's crazy talk I know.

Why You Gotta Be a Service Hater?

In my experience as a volunteer manager, I have sometimes had volunteers tell me that friends and spouses would ask them why they were spending so much time working without pay. The friend or spouse would sometimes try to convince them that they were under appreciated because they were not paid for all their blood, sweat, and tears. Most of my volunteers would tell me this with a "I know different" gleam in their eyes. Because let me tell you, my friends, volunteering is its own reward. There is nothing like seeing kids you've known since they were wee little ones leave for college as amazing young adults, with skills that surpass their peers, and knowing that the time that you have spent over the years contributing to their growth has helped make them the confident, capable leaders that stand before you.

I think of my current seniors who are leaving me soon. I love them all, and they are all amazing, independent, smart, accomplished young women. My mind is drawn to one who, when I met her, was a sweetly sarcastic little 6th grader. Her parents had taught her to always offer to help, and to be positive and friendly. Through the years I have always been able to count on her and her little sister (who I get to keep for a while longer) to be the first (and sometimes only) kids at events to offer to help me set up, to carry things to and from my car, to clean up, and in general to just be super helpful. When I first met her I'm pretty sure she would not have gotten up front in a room full of people and given an impromptu speech, or instinctively spoken up as the leader in a group of her peers. As she has grown, I have seen amazing talents emerge. I can call on her at a moments notice to welcome a group of children and their parents to an event. I can ask her to help make every teenager at an event feel as though they belong, and know that she will automatically welcome new people, get to know them, and in general make them excited to be there. I also know that I can tell her that she needs to plan a weekend event for over 100 people, line up 20 or 30 workshops, assign each participant to 4 workshops that interest them personally, plan a theme (complete with decorations and an evening program for the whole group), produce a packet of information for each group, welcome arriving participants, make announcements throughout the weekend, and field any complaints or problems from both adults and her peers, and she would know without a doubt that she could do it. Not only that, but she would do it amazingly well, and difficult people who always find things to complain about would lavish praise on her. I know this because she has done all these things. Had I told her as a 6th grader that this was my vision for her, she might have laughed at me. But her experiences with volunteers who love her, and as a volunteer herself (not to discount some incredible parenting or the things she drew from her high school classes) led her down a path that gave her the opportunities to develop those talents.

That is just one example of why someone might spend "all that time" volunteering. Not only does it warm my heart as an adult who has worked with her (although I can't technically say I've volunteered with her, for the most part, having been staff for the majority of her youth), but I also know that she gained skills through volunteering. I can also give you countless examples of adults I have worked with who I've seen grow through their volunteer work; adults who didn't think they could do something found that they actually had a knack for it, and that they enjoyed it. They gained a skill or two, and they learned something new about themselves. In addition to all this skill-building, I've seen strong friendships form between volunteers (both youth and adults) who would not have crossed paths had it not been for their volunteer duties in Camp Fire.

So to recap, volunteering has the following benefits:
1. You get warm fuzzy feelings.
2. You can gain new skills (these can even go on your resume, people).
3. You can learn new things about yourself.
4. You can make new friends.


I know there are other benefits, but those are my top four. And that is why I am still volunteering for Camp Fire. So stop scolding and go find your own opportunity.