Am I Really Old Enough to be Retrospecting?

I recently went to a High School graduation ceremony, and by recently I mean last June. This, my friends, is what happens when you draft things when you are unemployed. You get distracted by the business of watching infomercials and the brilliant posts you compose fall by the wayside. But never fear, my blogger-block has inspired me to dig it out. Anywho, when at this commencement ceremony, it caused me to look back over the years, and count, and realize it's been over a decade since my High School graduation (in fact it's almost a decade since I graduated from college), and freak out, and then reflect.

First, it made me reflect on how our society is deteriorating rapidly and some people should not be allowed out in public. To the people sitting around us: maybe you've never been to a graduation before (see what I did there? I've been holding that in for a week), but when they play Pomp and Circumstance, you are supposed to STAND. From the first graduate to the last graduate. You will not die from all of that standing. Also, just because your particular graduate apparently made it there by the skin of their teeth and is not part of the band or choir, or one of the speakers, does not entitle you to talk LOUDLY during the choir and band performances, and over the poor valedictorian who worked so hard to prepare a speech. It was his moment. He's going off to college, where he most likely won't be known by all, and ranked the smartest. And you totally just disrespected him. Shame on you, people behind me. And ANOTHER thing. When the master of ceremonies reminds us SIX TIMES that you should not use air horns, that means that you SHOULD NOT. Nor should you hand it to your teenager, and have them do it. There's this thing your supposed to be doing--parenting. You know, where you teach your kids that breaking the rules placed there in respect to those eager to hear their name read, a moment they have dreamed about for years, is jacked up. Way to go parents. You have perpetuated the tradition of idiots at graduation. Your children will follow in your footsteps.

Second, the valedictorian's speech caused me to reflect. He did what I think is common at this point in your education career. He talked about teachers who had helped shape him at his high school, and why they are so great. I really did love that he did this. It was obvious that these teachers were loved by many from the crowd reaction when he dropped their names. I can think of teachers at my high school that got this recognition at assemblies and during other gatherings such as graduation. I automatically think of my teacher, Mr Vinson, who was my favorite teacher in Junior High School. He was my teacher who made me want to be the best in a classroom for the first time since elementary school, and he showed us how to have fun while applying ourselves. He always got the cheers at school gatherings. I think of my choir teacher, Mr. T (he probably pities the fool, but it's not that Mr. T) who was one of the best high school choir teachers out there. Even though I'm pretty sure he didn't like me very much (he once yelled at me for looking at my nails too much while we practiced in front of the whole class--a nervous habit I had at the time, and possibly still do. But he was right. I'm sure I was annoying). Those are two teachers who I'm sure have gotten lots of shouts-out throughout the years. As an adult who now works with teenagers, I think of them both a lot, especially Mr. Vinson. Working with teenagers is a hard job. Even if you know you have to be the bad guy sometimes, since you are in a position of authority, and have to think about their safety and well-being, you still want them to like you. It's sad when they don't. I sometimes question if I"m asserting my authority correctly, or if I'm coming across more like Mr. Fill-in-the-Name, who always made me wonder why he taught since he seemed to hate teenagers. In reality, and in retrospect, I don't think he did hate teenagers. He just didn't put up with some of our adolescent antics, among other things. And sometimes I am that adult.

In retrospect, having been in the position where you care about these sweet little teenagers, and watch them grow and change and become adults, I wish I had shown more gratitude to my teachers. Certain teachers knew I appreciated them. But I never was that kid who brought the card on teacher appreciation day. And as an adult, I realize how hard it is to tell sometimes how much you are impacting their lives. I have teenagers who seem to like me, but I do not generally even factor in when they think about the things they will miss when they go to college, along with most other adults who have impacted them deeply for years. Lately I've had some sweet girls who are more vocal about their appreciation for me. When they all chime in and tell me they love me, or that I'm funny, or they include me in a conversation about the boy they like or the dress they're getting for prom, or they "friend" me on MyFace, I'm always a little surprised. And I think that maybe, just maybe, someday I'll be cool. I just need to go look up krunk on urbandictionary.com. Because I seriously don't know what it means. And I've got to be old if I don't even have a guess what the slang means, right?